Tuesday, 5 March 2013

Don’t Make Me Love Again


Bitter is the taste of defeat on my tongue
Though I have never had regrets before
Maybe you’re the first one
It hurts to think of how I tried to make you smile
And behind my back you’re laughing now
You have been laughing all the while

For years and years I’ve tried to hide
Behind my shell
Sideways stepped to claim my prize
Wore out my day pass to hell
And now I wear this cloak of desperation
There is only so much, until...

This silence that now holds me thrall
This protection behind my bunker wall
I will enclose my heart, trapped within
No longer will I let myself sing
I struggle to get the right words out
I fight reason with this weight of doubt

If there is a refuge somewhere, show me now?

I want to escape...

Now I see you... you’re smiling
The cradle of your arms... inviting
The raft of my life tossed on these high seas
Rescue me; I plead.

Let us not play with words of hurt
Let us not play with words of blame
I take the knife you pass me, handle first
Only I take it by the blade
The blood I draw is flamed red
Of the mixed messages inside my head

I am writing poetry in the sand
On this page the words are perfect
But where the greedy ocean eats the land
My words I have to forfeit

This silence that now holds me thrall
This protection behind my bunker wall
I will enclose my heart, trapped within
No longer will I let myself sing
I struggle to get the right words out
I fight reason with this weight of doubt

If there is a refuge somewhere, show me now?

And in the crystal shards of time
Once where I drew a line
In the cracked faces of age and space
I must begin a new race
For the past is gone, the past is dead
But the memories alive inside my head
Threaten to drag me into the black
But I cannot return; I must not go back!

And when this evening’s work is done
And the moon once more is claimed by the sun
Maybe it would be for the best
To lay this broken love to rest

Don’t make me love again (this love, dying)
Don’t make me love again (this love, dead)
Don’t make me love again (these words, buried)
Don’t make me love again (my soul at rest)